"I have such a sergeant's professional deformity," says 36-year-old Serhiy Leshchenko. - When you see healthy guys walking with half-axes, you think: "Oh, this would be a good machine gunner. And this one is a grenade launcher. I would pull!".
Leshchenko is from the Dnipropetrovsk region. He passed the ATO as a scout in 2015-2016, and after that he became known as a writer. In 2020, the Ukrainian-language translation of his Russian-language novel "Yupak" won the "BBC Book of the Year" award in the "Fiction" category.
The story about life in the hinterland, written by Surzhyk, was not liked by everyone. But Leshchenko himself, who took the creative pseudonym Saigon, does not pay attention to the criticism of lovers of "high" literature. In life, he speaks as he writes - in non-literary language and with obscene vocabulary.
"The fight for the state is not a fight for the purity of the Ukrainian language," he says conversation with the journalist "UP". - Do not break over the knee. I don't care what language you speak in the war. If, little brother, you can fulfill combat tasks - go ahead, get busy!".
"Those people who did not stand up with weapons in their hands and did not go to the front to defend the state often fight for language," Saigon continues. - Those guys who are really killing their enemies now are mostly out of touch.
In principle, as a person with a second native Russian, I will say this: "If I somehow do not go to the front with a machine gun in my hands and speak Russian, I can switch places with a Ukrainian-speaking patriot who is sitting in the rear. Come here and speak in whatever language you want. At least in Hungarian. The main thing is that the front line stands."
These days, Serhiy is in the hospital - chronic back problems showed up after five grueling months of full-scale war as part of the 109th Separate Mountain Assault Battalion. But he says he will return to the army, even if he has to inject morphine for pain relief.
In an interview with "UP" Serhii Saigon talks about the value of silence and humor, gives an adequate assessment of the enemy and reminds us of the importance of the Ukrainian village not only in peaceful life, but also in war.
Next - direct, non-literary (!) language.
I have an acquaintance, I always yell at him that he has reached the age of a grandpa. Like, you know, that old man who is already on the subway at five in the morning with a checkered bag. He gets up early and always writes to me.
It was 5:03 a.m. (February 24 - UT) when the first message flashed. I thought, "Oh shit, Grandpa's awake." I'm going to the subway" (laughs). And then it started: 5:05, 5:06, 5:07...
The first thing I opened and read was from an acquaintance. The war came knocking at my house with two words: "F***ing started."
At that time, I was promoting my second book about the village - Tales of the Wild Steppe. It was released only two months ago, and the circulation was about half. Then I had, so to speak, an off-season period.
I did not go to the Military Commissariat, I called my former platoon commander. At 8:00 I went to the location of the battalion. And at night, at 1:40 a.m. on February 25, he already received a machine gun.
What struck me that day? (Long pause). Seven dogs...
On the way from civilian to war on February 24, we counted seven downed dogs on the road. On all the roads of Ukraine, people were very slow. Someone hastened to escape. Someone - on the contrary, drive in the opposite direction, to where the battles are taking place.
My cat Horchitsa stayed at home. I love my cat. I'm sorry, it's kind of a *** to go to war, to close it so that it dies of hunger (laughs). Thank God, my good friend, Yura's friend, took care of her then. He himself has two cats.
Once upon a time, a goat and a kid lived in our farm. We just found them there, so... This goat was already like a member of the family, a member of our unit.
Somehow they (the Russians - UP) mow down such a normal landing. And in the evening we talk on the walkie-talkie, the officer says: "I feel sorry for the goat. Goat 200 (killed - UP)". Here the battalion connects to the air, shouts: "Who is 200?! Guys, who is 200?". We are: "Goat". Pause. Rotny says: "Well, you're done!"
Then it turned out that the goat was not 200, but 300 (wounded - UP).
When you get into a position, you establish yourself, when plus or minus everything is clear, these evening broadcasts on the walkie-talkies are very valuable to me. It's cool when there is room for such negotiations. When you can just laugh.
In the war, there must be such a number.
Energy
This is already the second war for me (after participating in the ATO-UP). She is really different. The difference is simply amazing! In dynamics, in the level of use of weapons, in the number of people involved, in everything.
I got older. With such loads it became more difficult. Much harder. However, in the phase of that hybrid aggression, there were almost no maneuvers, only at the very beginning (in 2014, 2015 - UP). Next was the position.
Now everything is decided by speed and maneuver. A few years ago, frankly speaking, we didn't have much of this practice. Therefore, this is a completely different war.
Such intensity of fire action! Here, every day is like the last. I don't want you to spend your last day in the mood of some depressed piece of shit and die like a depressed piece of shit.
What, do you have a funny story to tell? (Laughs). I'm like that, no nigga, okay?
Karochye, we are going on a bus at night. It is necessary to bring the boys to the landing, throw water, food, arrows to the RPG (ammunition for a hand grenade launcher - UP).
There are six or seven of us. There is a sealed box of energy workers in the bush, that is. And one sergeant, Matyukha, says: "Yours? Can I take it?". "Take it," I say. He pushes three or four cans "erpeeske" (RPS, belt-shoulder system, "unloading" - UP).
This is where we get stuck. We climb out, start pushing the busik. We push, we push him. And the bastards (Russians - UP) are not far away, they hear that the machine is working, and they start looking for us - they throw a little mortar at us. It does not fly directly to the side, but in a row.
We heard the exits - we fall to the ground. Goop-goop-goop! We get up, push further - to the next exits. And here, after a couple of underflights, just a crazy scream.
"Medic, damn it! Me-ye-ye-di-ka-ah-ah! I'm bleeding!" - shouts Matyuha.
We run up to him, and I hear this sound: sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh (laughs loudly)! I say: "Shit, Matyuha, get up! Redbull hit you with a shard."
Vorog
I am a soldier. Kanyesha, I believe in some karmic things. But, if I'm honest, I didn't think what was waiting for the Russians. In this regard, the opponent is of little interest to me. He generally interests me only to the extent that he does not become a dead opponent.
The reincarnation of the Golden Horde, which we now see in the form of the Russian Federation, has experience. The experience of dying in wars of occupation. Therefore, nothing terrible awaits them. Someone will drink, someone in a wheelchair will ride in medals (emphasis on "I" - UP).
This is an Asian country. Parents will fulfill their dreams: to give away their sons and buy Lada Kalina (referring to the plot of the propagandists about how the father bought a car with the money received for his son who died in Ukraine - UP).
And in the future, "Rus" will continue to live, dance and cry under the fence. For them, this is a normal state. So I don't worry much about them. They are stuck somewhere in the year 1240 and the planet is moving forward.
I have no reflections on the enemy. I have this normal condition of a soldier: there is an enemy with whom I am fighting directly on the line of battle.
If he comes to me as a prisoner alive, I will most likely provide him with medical assistance. I will bandage his wound, if there is anything, if not to the detriment of my people. I'll give him a cigarette. And that's probably the end of it.
The enemy is interesting to me as a unit that will be exchanged for our boy, who was also captured.
One should not (pause) respect the enemy, but give him an adequate assessment. Until February 24, they evaluated us inadequately, but it has already passed (laughs). For many Katsap soldiers, it was a discovery of what Ukrainians are capable of.
You know, when we talk about how cool we are, and the enemy is completely useless, we even let ourselves down a little. If it were so, we would not know the losses. In my opinion, the Russians (pause) are not all, but they are not fucking fighting.
Purely as a boy, I am doubly pleased that I am fighting with those who have created an image for themselves of such, f**d, f**ked soldiers, who will make the West cringe. Do you struggle with them?
In the future, it will be like this: "Do you have Russians? Call Ukrainians!" (laughs). The Russian mafia is no longer taking off.
Village
We all come from the village. They became townspeople in the second and third generations. When the war began, the Ukrainian village went to plantations, green fields, and industrial zones.
Bro, I'm sorry, damn it, I don't have any men in my village in the Dnipropetrovsk region.
I knew very well who was capable of going to war, that is. I knew it back when I was riding the same "Yupaks" (Soviet Jupiter motorcycle - UP) with the boys. When he drank vodka with them, he participated in raids. Knew who wouldn't make a mistake. By character, by actions, by how a person lives and what he orients himself to in life. How does he behave in the same fight.
Media news today requires some special people and fates. Something extraordinary. Who is interested in simple workers who join the infantry and do menial work? Who needs that boy from the village who took a shovel, digs, shoots with a machine gun?
But, you know, I don't want to make this gradation now - village or garden. Ukrainians stood up to defend their homeland. It doesn't matter who is fighting: barbers or tractor drivers.
You see, service in the infantry is the most difficult in the war. I am very, very proud to serve in the 109th Separate Mountain Assault Battalion. Here are real Ukrainian lions. You know who always scores in a good way? Miners These are men! Steel! I'm serious.
In the war I saw many burning fields. It hurts, to be honest. It hurts a lot.
Before the war, I had never seen an ear of corn burning. If bread burns in the village, it is a disaster. Tragedy. Regional state of emergency.
Before the full-scale invasion, everyone liked to lament that the Ukrainian village was dying out. Why doesn't anyone want to go there? People choose convenience. People choose a clinic nearby, a toilet, a hot shower, rather than a barrel outside.
I saw many people crying that the Ukrainian village is in decline. But what's wrong with selling your cozy apartments in Kyiv, which are often very uncomfortable? These smart booths, damn it, there is nowhere to turn around. And then they would come to the village, buy five hectares of land and plow it.
Well, if at least the phrase "Ukrainian village" remains (emphasizes the word "Ukrainian" - UP). For this you need to win the war. And when we win it, the same will happen to our village as it did to the Swiss, Canadian, American, and Polish villages.
We will move forward in this regard. Together with humanity.
Gain time
Come on: we are great guys. We have enough motivation. We miraculously hold the overwhelming forces of the enemy. Sometimes it's some wild mixture of stupidity, courage, po**ism and someone's incompetence. As long as insanity and courage prevail in this cocktail, everything works out for us.
But the war is not only on the battlefield. Not only in a specific landing, village or city. There is also politics and economics. Tomorrow, Russia will switch to a camp economy. All of them will be forced to go to factories - and all these slaves will go to factories and sharpen shells.
Our economy is weaker. We cannot switch to the camp type. And we no longer extract the market one...
What other specific problems does Saigon see? If the training of those being mobilized does not change, soon there will be no one to send to the front. You can't just take a person from the street and throw them into the landing without explaining anything. We will continue to suffer losses from this. We will have fewer and fewer people on the front lines.
It is necessary to invest at least minimally in a person, and not to say: "It's a war, we don't have time."
I understand that people like me, who are ready, experienced, today gain time. I am ready to die to buy time. But the whole question is what for? To what?
To move into a counteroffensive, you need to accumulate resources. And if we don't accumulate it, we don't train people, then it will be difficult to understand if we will win time?
But, you know, there are actually a lot of positive moments in this war.
Thank God that this has not changed since the time of the ATO: when it comes to fried chickens, we know how to unite, as always. In critical situations, no one demands reports or pieces of paper. Everyone works for the result, that is. This is the first.
The second is the heroism of our ordinary soldiers and officers.
And also - security. Personally, I suddenly realized that during five months of service, I did not have a single problem with security. I don't remember that I was missing anything.
Tisha
The hardest thing in war is to wait. You don't know what to wait for. Arrived, p***rasiv in landing. Artillery. Tanks.
Wait for the end. The end of something. minutes hours of the day End of task. The end of the war. Waiting is the hardest thing.
You know, I have not yet heard silence in the war. If you participate in a war, over time, silence moves into the category of values that you need. At the front, it is such a deficit!
Here, in the hospital, we communicate almost in whispers with the boys on the floor. The opportunity to be in silence is so valuable to us now that we try not to disturb it. Sometimes it's so impressive that we have a XNUMX/XNUMX quiet time here, you know? You even raise your legs higher so as not to shuffle on the floor (laughs).
When there is a moment of peace at the front, in my head, as part of such an oral thought process, I ask myself if I can arrange a synopsis of one of the books. Which I would like to write someday later, if I am alive.
I am thinking about the synopsis so as not to lose my mind from all the events that surround me. It will, of course, be a fictional novel. But this time I decided that it will be about the Holodomor. Why? I do not know. That's what I wanted.
It is necessary to unload the operative from the topic of war. But in order to write such a book, it is still necessary to carry out extensive research on the Holodomor.
Foundation
I corresponded with my wife yesterday. She mentioned some name of a movie about the war, asks if he watched it. I say: "Yes, once upon a time." The movie, I say, is not bad, but I don't like the morality.
Then suddenly I realized that I will never, never, never in my life watch movies about war again (laughs). On**me? I myself participate in this movie. Enough for me! I had enough of this movie!
Being in this war is like being a stuntman in Apocalypse Now with only one take. Well, where else was this in the 21st century? And in the 20th century after the Second World War? Iraq? Iran? I do not know…
Now we can't categorize the experiences we've had. What we are experiencing. Everything that happens is simply recorded on the subcortex at breakneck speed. And then, when you start to think, analyze, it will overtake us, oppress us. Necessarily.
If you go on Facebook while you are at the front, it affects you like hell. When Kyiv was bombed, when it was under threat of occupation, even on the Internet we all looked like a nation. Something was similar to the same unity that I wanted for Ukraine.
But the impression is that as soon as the enemy moved away from Kyiv, the bloggers started to get smart again. The treason began again. It's fucking annoying. I try not to look at it at all.
After the war, everything will happen. We still haven't learned how to work with those who have passed the front. But if those who are lucky enough to return to the state of Ukraine, it will be a victory in any case. And it will be possible to tolerate the beggars, the crippled, the useless and so on.
If we keep the state, it will be a foundation to work with. What we will do when we return from the war depends on us. You can go to the crossing and ask for alms, or you can do something meaningful.
Everything will be. But I will return (to the army - UP) in any case. My back is not a problem that appeared yesterday. I used to inject myself with diclofenac and vitamin B when I was still in the ATO, when I served in intelligence. But these five months in the infantry finished it off.
A few months ago, I took off my Bronic on the Kyiv route and realized that I would never wear it again. And I don't wear it anymore. Only a helmet. If there is a hole in the belly, it can still be patched, but it is more difficult to patch a hole in the head.
Apart from vomiting, diclofenac doesn't cause me anything now - the body no longer accepts it. But I'll still be back, even if I have to inject morphine to get back.
I don't know what they will decide there, but in any case, I don't want to be written off. If there are problems, maybe I will think about continuing to serve as an instructor. So that those zero boys would not be sent to boarding school and they would not die there, damn it, on the first Sunday.
It's hard to fight. Honestly, it's very difficult. But it will still have to be done if we need those 600 square kilometers (the area of Ukraine is 603 km² - UP).
There is no other. We did everything not to fight. We have been doing everything for more than 20 years. But it didn't work out. Still caught up. Now it is necessary.
Took a kalash - *bash!
Evgeny Rudenko - UP
